Explanations and results

[pen_grunt]

On Tuesday, I ended up snapping at my boss. 

I had given him a task, and he hadn't done it. 
Then when we were trying to complete the task, he had an idea for a show segment. I vetoed it.
He kept saying "You can make it funny". I kept saying "That isn't helpful--I'm telling you I don't see how the premise can be funny without being shoehorned in. It's just a bad concept. Maybe if we did X instead."
"But you'll make it funny."
"Give me examples of what funny would look like with your premise."

And instead of doing that, he explained the concept again like I wasn't understanding it. 
I get it, I said, it's just not funny. 

It's not that I don't understand you. It's that I don't agree with you. I felt like Nancy Regan shouting at Ronnie: You don't have to explain it to them again. They get it. They just don't LIKE it. 

Then he tried to pour the funny on and it just...wasn't...working. 
"Well I don't know. You'll make it funny!"
"I'm telling you it's a bad premise."

I gave him alternate ways that I thought it would work. 

I went downstairs to get some water. When I came back he was diagramming the premise and started explaining it to me again. This is four times. 
In a very sharp way I snapped at him: YOU DO NOT NEED TO EXPLAIN THIS TO ME. I GET IT. I UNDERSTAND IT. IT'S JUST A BAD IDEA. UNLESS YOU CAN GIVE ME AN EXAMPLE OF HOW IT WILL WORK, I'M CUTTING IT. You haven't been able to do that. You just keep telling me I'll make it work when I'm telling you it can't be worked with. I GET THE IDEA. I GET IT. I UNDERSTAND IT. 

And then we got on a call with a client. My understanding was that this had been dropped. But no. He interrupted my creative run-down to insert this stupid concept into the flow. I vigorously shook my head, but he wanted his idea in there--not my alternate. 

So I tried to put it in the script. I made it...sort of work. (I can make a lot of things work in the best way they *can* work.)

I just got script feedback from my boss. 

"This doesn't work like this... let's do it [alternate way that I suggested and fought for and he's now presenting as his own, new idea]."

Me, jaw locked: "Yes. I know that way will work. THAT IS WHAT I TOLD YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE. 
"Oh. Did you?"
"Yes. And I told you your concept wouldn't work. Which it doesn't. You sat there and explained it to me 4 times as though I just didn't get it--and it DOES NOT WORK."
"Yeah, sometimes you just need to see it."
"I DID NOT NEED TO SEE IT."
"Well, change it to [alternate]."
"Fine. Next time LISTEN TO ME."

Comments

[msmidge.livejournal.com]

Oh, I want to slap him for you.

[pen-grunt.livejournal.com]

I know physical violence isn't the way to solve problems...but just ONCE it would be so satisfying to deliver a resounding slap.

[eyelid.livejournal.com]

Your boss is like a walking white guy stereotype.

[pen-grunt.livejournal.com]

He is!

I think there's this feeling that women exaggerate when they give examples* like: "I stated my idea, he ignored it, and then literally presented my idea as his own TO me and then explained it ad nauseam" because that's crazy! Who would do that!

But alas!

*(I've certainly been asked why I insist on bringing things like this up--like I'm "too sensitive" about it.)