Feminot

[pen_grunt]

Things that drive me nuts?

When someone says something like this:

"Well, of course I think women should get equal pay for equal work...but I wouldn't call myself a FEMINIST."

Anti-feminists (is that the right term? I don't even know.) have done a very good job of demonizing feminism as an extreme and untenable thing (i.e. "Man haters!" "Bra-burners" "Feminazis!") which has a lot of women (and others) who do--at the heart of it--believe in feminist principles deny their status as a feminist.

I've even heard this from someone I would consider very "feminist" in their views:

"I'm not a feminist because I don't like to be labeled."

or

"I'm not a feminist. I believe that women should be able to be stay at home moms if they want to and not be forced to go back to work." [The key component here is the phrasing "if they want to" and "forced"...how is the idea of career/parenting choice NOT feminist?]

Congrats, anti-feminists. When someone says things like this, you've won.

It's not just on-the-fence or traditional-values people who say things like this. I would label D a feminist (he acts--in every single way--in accordance with feminist values) but I doubt that he would voluntarily declare that he's a feminist. When asked he would accept the label without argument, but it's not how he self-identifies.

Comments

[gloomchen.livejournal.com]

I think the issue is that by most REASONABLE standards, feminist = egalitarian. Once upon a time, "feminist" was the best way to define that because it was solely a woman's fight to be on an equal playing field with men. Granted, that's what it still is... but then there's Tumblr feminism.

The word has been demonized because there are definitely people out there making it something to demonize. The only ways to fight back are to try and take control of the word (at which point you almost have to go into a long explanation of which school of feminism with which you align) or you identify as an egalitarian, which takes the stink off making men the "bad guys."

tl;dr YAY PATRIARCHY

[pen-grunt.livejournal.com]

I've been seeing a shift of reasonable standards in modern times--I think as people become less threatened by the idea of "feminism", or they see that it's really beneficial to all sexes, it's become less loaded. I would expect that it will continue to do so with little micro-swings of backlash (i.e. women, especially, declaring that they are NOT feminists because they like their husband to manage the money...or whatever).

There are obnoxious assholes in every group, unfortunately. I'm pretty comfortable aligning with "Feminist" and not explaining it--eventually people will figure out that I'm not here to stomp balls and whatnot.

[i12bmore.livejournal.com]

So, here's a thought I've been dying to talk with someone about:

I've been afraid to call myself a feminist because I know some feminists say that anyone who enjoys the benefits of male privilege can't truly and seriously empathise with the feminist cause and thus can't label themselves a feminist. To me, it's akin to the common standard in the trans* community that a person can't truly call themselves a trans* ally; instead, it's up to the trans* community to determine if someone has done enough for the trans* community to be called an ally.

If I don't belong to a community, I want to respect that community's standards however I can. But if I don't label myself openly, then it can be easier for other people's expressions of privilege to go on unchallenged. Ultimately, I know, actions speak louder than words. But, in today's cultural climate, can labeling oneself be considered an action, however small?

What do you think?

[pen-grunt.livejournal.com]

Though I certainly don't purport to speak for all female feminists, it makes me happy when my male friends openly self-label as feminists.

I also think that, to counter the slander of feminism as some sort of "man-hating" thing (I'm thinking of Rush Limbaugh being the main example of this bile that pops to mind), visible male feminists that label themselves as such are important to feminism as a whole.

I *do* think we're still at the stage in society where "not just girls are feminists" is a novel (and critical) thing to communicate. Unfortunately, this may be an underlying side effect of the patriarchal structure (things become "important" when men support them too), but it's where we're at right now.

In syntax, I think that feminism communicates a state of mind or value system more than being part of an organized community--so where I could see that being an "ally" requires action and approval of the community, it's my personal view that anyone with a feminist worldview can declare themselves a feminist.

[grenacia.livejournal.com]

Please go ahead and self-identify as a feminist if you are in favor of gender equality. There's a lot of variety in feminist belief, but these days within most of the feminist community that's all you really need to be accepted as being a feminist. Though it also helps to understand that gender inequality is not just a thing of the past, which is a sticking point with some people.

I've never been fond of the words "feminist/feminism" because they have negative connotations due to sharing a suffix with words like racist/racism, sexist/sexism, communist/communism etc., and also because of the common misinterpretation that a feminist would believe in female superiority. But feminist is the word we have, so I live with it.

I think the only time it would be problematic for someone to self-identify as a feminist, would be if they were using their status as a feminist to make excuses for distinctly anti-feminist opinions or behaviors.