Yahoo! News Snapshot
Feb. 26th, 2007 12:46 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
pen_gruntI'm amused by news headlines on a near-daily basis. They're sensational without any sensation, but I admire the writers. It must be difficult to come up with new news headlines on a daily (and hourly) basis. Just looking at the top 7 (and not reading any articles, mind you):
1. Deliberations continue as Libby juror dismissed.
This is the top news item. This is the best they could do. Dismissed juror in the TRIAL OF THE CENTURY! Actually, it's a trial that the media is trying REALLY hard to get people to care about. Even if I were overly interested in the Scooter Libby trial (Scooter...heehee...), I don't think they could make me care about a dismissed juror.
2. U.N. to consider trade, arms sanctions on Iran.
Wait, we've still been trading arms to Iran? This brings me back to Jon Stewart's statement, that when Bush said, "Let's attack Iraq, did he really mean Iran? Because there's only one letter of difference....and that's a mistake that people could forgive."
3. Iraq PM calls oil deal a 'founding stone' for investment.
Iraq PM sounds kind of like a cold medicine. Sure, I know it stands for Prime Minister, but I had to think about it for a second before realizing that there wasn't going to be some sort of oily addition to my nasal spray.
4. U.S. Warship nears vessel hijacked by Somalia pirates.
Ahh, the "no news yet" headline. It nears a vessel....it hasn't reached the vessel--so really, nothing has happened. Additionally: pirates? There are still pirates? Somehow, in some small petty way, that gives me hope for the world.
5. Postal regulators recommend 2-cent stamp hike.
Scandal! I call scandal! They just raised the rates a year ago...now all my stamps are going to be worthless. Or, rather, worthless on their own. In other news, they're considering a "forever" stamp--which you buy at a base rate--and it's good for forever despite rate hikes. A bid to get cash fast that will surely fizzle as gas prices increase? Yes. Will I bite? Of course.
6. World coffee growers urged not to raise production.
...by really hyper, jittery executives.
7. Thank-you cam kept Oscar telecast moving.
But not nearly fast enough. I want to love the Oscars, but it's just...so...boring. I tuned in when Clint Eastwood was handing out a lifetime achievement award for movie scoring. The guy receiving the award not only looked completely apathetic, but also bored and slightly disdainful. Then I saw his montage and I understood why.
1. Deliberations continue as Libby juror dismissed.
This is the top news item. This is the best they could do. Dismissed juror in the TRIAL OF THE CENTURY! Actually, it's a trial that the media is trying REALLY hard to get people to care about. Even if I were overly interested in the Scooter Libby trial (Scooter...heehee...), I don't think they could make me care about a dismissed juror.
2. U.N. to consider trade, arms sanctions on Iran.
Wait, we've still been trading arms to Iran? This brings me back to Jon Stewart's statement, that when Bush said, "Let's attack Iraq, did he really mean Iran? Because there's only one letter of difference....and that's a mistake that people could forgive."
3. Iraq PM calls oil deal a 'founding stone' for investment.
Iraq PM sounds kind of like a cold medicine. Sure, I know it stands for Prime Minister, but I had to think about it for a second before realizing that there wasn't going to be some sort of oily addition to my nasal spray.
4. U.S. Warship nears vessel hijacked by Somalia pirates.
Ahh, the "no news yet" headline. It nears a vessel....it hasn't reached the vessel--so really, nothing has happened. Additionally: pirates? There are still pirates? Somehow, in some small petty way, that gives me hope for the world.
5. Postal regulators recommend 2-cent stamp hike.
Scandal! I call scandal! They just raised the rates a year ago...now all my stamps are going to be worthless. Or, rather, worthless on their own. In other news, they're considering a "forever" stamp--which you buy at a base rate--and it's good for forever despite rate hikes. A bid to get cash fast that will surely fizzle as gas prices increase? Yes. Will I bite? Of course.
6. World coffee growers urged not to raise production.
...by really hyper, jittery executives.
7. Thank-you cam kept Oscar telecast moving.
But not nearly fast enough. I want to love the Oscars, but it's just...so...boring. I tuned in when Clint Eastwood was handing out a lifetime achievement award for movie scoring. The guy receiving the award not only looked completely apathetic, but also bored and slightly disdainful. Then I saw his montage and I understood why.
